"Revolutionaries"...something to ponder

I was reading Brandon Wellcome's webpage when a trend I've noticed and struggled with was brought to my attention: People dissatisfied with the church. Having gone through Ministry Team Training in my early high school years, I was taught to be the solution to the problem you've got with your body of believers. However, a new report and book by George Barna has me thinking about my firmly formed opinion on church. I started to ask myself if it really is okay for people to leave the church building for a small group of believers in a different setting. Today, the obvious way the body of Christ is identified is in a building and by the activities. Our culture seems to be heading away from that. I still strongly value the institution as it is and the heart behind it. I still see programs that a home church could never pull off on its own among and the way God has used churches for centuries. I also see dissatisfaction and have experienced the community we are told to have outside of the church walls and in evenings...at my "Love Feast" as we call it. We eat, talk, pray and share what God is doing. I'm interested to see what happens with this. In the meantime, I am a church-goer that goes and gives and tries to find out how God wants to use me in that setting.

Read the report...maybe even the book.

brandonwellcome.com/blog
http://www.barna.org/FlexPage.aspx?Page=BarnaUpdateNarrow&BarnaUpdateID=201

Gun in face and Bible in hand

For the past few days I've been wanting to tell someone, anyone a story in my family history that is pretty special.

Between 50 and 70 years ago in Canada, there was a preacher that really loved God. His congregation was in a small country town and one of the members was a young mother. Her children attended with her, but never her husband. The husband thought it all nonsense. Infact, when the preacher would visit this family in particular, he always got a lot of flack from the husband. It got to the point that the pastor's witnessing resulted in a serious threat from the husband. If that man were to step foot on their property again, the husband of this young parishoner of his would kill him. Well, the pastor's love for this man and for Jesus was too great to keep the pastor away from this man. He returned and was greeted with a rifle (well it may have been a shot gun...I don't know the difference). God had something up His sleeve because that day, my grandma's cousin's husband's father became a Christian with the help of Joe Kopp, the father of Tom Kopp, one of my professors at Bible college.

May God use you and me as much as he did Joe Kopp, who was willing to both live and die for the glory of God.

When I want Jesus Most

Nobody likes a gloomy person, so after the weekend, I decided that when a customer asked, I was "okay" and no longer "not having the best day." I wasn't on the verge of tears anymore, but the effects of last week's events along with the new things that popped up at school on Monday or hit me on Monday were trailing along with everything else.

Last night as I was driving "John," my new Christian friend home after our home group with other believers, he told me that I seemed really frustrated. It wasn't until then that I realized that I was still pulling all of my problems along with me.

This morning I decided to skip my classes for today. After informing my teachers, I went back to sleep, woke up around 10am, got dressed, ate and went for a drive. Commonly, when I am upset about something, I will drive on the backroads toward Buckley until 410 and I will drive into Bonney Lake ending up at the Starbucks there. Today was no different. I ordered a Tall Decaf Pumpkin Spice Latte and sat down. I wrote out my heart on everything that was going on and seven and a half pages later, my prayers to God didn't seem to help much. I bought a Molassas cookie on my way out the door and as I drove back the way I came, I found myself praying something remeniscent of the night before classes. "I want you Jesus. I want you. I want you." Over and over again aloud or just in my heart. My frustration had only increased in my prayers. I didn't want to deal with them anymore. I just wanted my Jesus. I wanted Him.

I got home shortly thereafter dissapointed that skipping classes had left me in the same place I was to begin with...except more frustrated and wanting nothing else than my Lord...not a very practical or effective use of time. However, Mom invited me to go and pick up Connor and Kaelyn from school (my little brother and sister). While she was getting Connor, I stayed in the car and listened to music. A song by Jars of Clay came on. It spoke my heart completely and reminded me of all I knew about getting through hard times. Incase you are unfamiliar with The Valley Song, the lyrics are below.

Jars Of Clay - The Valley Song

You have led me to the sadness
I have carried this pain
On a back bruised, nearly broken
I'm crying out to You

Chorus
I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy

When death like a gypsy
Comes to steal what I love
I will still look to the heavens
I will still seek your face

But I fear you aren't listening
Because there are no words
Just the stillness and the hunger
For a faith that assures

I will sing of Your mercy
That leads me through valleys of sorrow
To rivers of joy

Alleluia, alleluia
Alleluia, alleluia

While we wait for rescue
With our eyes tightly shut
Face to the ground using our hands
To cover the fatal cut

Though the pain is an ocean
Tossing us around, around, around
You have calmed greater waters
Higher mountains have come down

What it really comes down to is taht God led me here. He is good. He is with me. He is in charge. I started thinking of how much Jesus did for me on the cross and as always, my heart was softened in the midst of my own frustration and pain. I also remembered that I was told to love my enemies and I started praying for those at the forefront of my problems. I prayed for their prosperity and happiness and for God to take care of them as he takes care of me. It was really freeing. Instead of focusing on the problems, but looking at Jesus and seeking the best for those that hate or cause problems for me changed it all.

May God bring you to places when you want Jesus most and may He give you a "Valley Song" of your own when it feels like you can't go on!

Rough Day

So, Thursday and Friday were rough days. It isn't often that I have rough days. For me, this definitely qualified because I was informed that my procrastination and lack of organization resulted in the loss of my health insurance and the delay of applying to Western Washington University for another quarter. Friday, my car battery died.

On Thursday afternoon as I cried my eyes out while showering, I remembered Romans 8:28 and the commentary of "Deadlock" a novel about a Supreme Court Justice becoming a Christian. It coined the phrase "Reverse Paranoia" to describe the effects of the verse that says "And we know that in all things, God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." For whatever reason, all of my flaws have been accounted for in God's master plan and He will use it for my good! As I drove to work on Thursday, after these events, I wondered if I could hold it all together as numerous customers asked me "How are you" and I saw the sun in the sky. It was truly amazing! God used the clouds the make the beauty of the sun's light even prettier than it would have been otherwise! My life would be all the more amazing with all of my problems because God's work would show through. I realized that it was all going to work out. I even got a free Pumpkin Spice Latte on Thursday night.

Today was better. I was offered a job and I got to have some good conversation with a Christian that God had me cross paths with tonight. I also got to knit and read. To say the least, today was pleasant. I liked it.